Sigh

-
I feel so sad right now. It is not the kind of sadness that is gut-wrenching in its intensity, nor is it one of those, "Oh man, I just got a papercut" fleeting sadnesses. This kind of sadness sneaks up on me, little by little. One circumstance or internal struggle is met and I face it, or ignore it, thinking it can be bested. Then a new one surfaces unrelated or related to the first, and I am slightly bemused by it, but I trudge on unvanquished. Unfortunately, there are only so many of those urchins that I can fend off by myself. Lately they have been coming in droves, weakening my resolve. No sooner do I fight a few hundred off, but the next come crawling up my pant leg. I am trying to pray, but one of the little sadness buggers made its way to my ear, disguised itself as an awfully convincing truth and is whispering, "You may ask God for help, but He sure ain't hearing you." I know it is a lie, but at the same time, it feels so true right now. I could really use some prayer...and/or a really strong hug.

Comments

Julie Brunson said…
I'm often available for prayer/strong hug combos. Give me a call sometime...
October 15, 2009 at 11:08 PM
sora said…
love you, laels. big hugs and prayers comin' up!
October 18, 2009 at 10:47 AM
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

A Bunch of Busybodies

-
Image
"What'chya doin'?" -a goat in New Jersey, 2011 (photo y Laelia Watt) Standing at a bus stop recently, I absentmindedly checked my Facebook page for the fifth time that day, when it hit me. It has been a while since I could remember what it is like to not be aware of what 30 friends were thinking at any given time. I like Facebook. It is a great tool which has helped me categorize all my photos, keep in touch with family members scattered all over the world, and has sparked many fun conversations with my friends over the years, but I suddenly missed having my brain filled with only my own thoughts during the day. As a person who has moved frequently throughout my life, the oddest thing about social media is that the thoughts, activities, photos, and political leanings of the friends I would normally leave behind and slowly drift from, are suddenly displayed daily for me to peruse. Don't get me wrong, I like keeping in touch with old friends, and as I said, I...
Read more

Losing the Weight of Shame

-
Image
(Me with yearling horse at the University of AZ Equine Center. Photo by my Aunt) In my journey, I've been focusing more on seeking joy in my body. These are some free-flowing thoughts to express a few thoughts I have had along the way: There is so much SHAME out there from every direction. All the "how tos" of "losing weight" and "never good enoughs" drown out the joy that is eating powerful, life-giving foods and doing exhilarating things that one loves! Walking, riding my bike, dancing, Pilates, canoeing etc are things I can't wait to do! I don't run for exercise, because I despise running unless absolutely necessary. I say, pursue activities that make you feel happy to be alive and thankful for your body! Do you ever marvel in awe at the way your body moves? Study human anatomy and physiology, and you will discover that the simplest move of a muscle requires an intricate chain reaction of minute proportions. One tiny malfunction,...
Read more

We Don't Know Everything

-
Image
(Example lesson in a photo: We only see part of it. Frederick the cello-LCW 2009) Science and Religion, (for the purposes of this essay, here referred to as their societal and historical entities), have much more in common than either camp has deigned to admit over the past few centuries. As any cursory glance of history will prove, both have been wrong at one time or another. This fact is not easily swallowed by the followers of those who believe Science holds all the answers to the exclusion of Religion, and it is equally unpalatable to the followers who believe Religion holds the only answers to the exclusion of Science. These are the commonalities between Science and Religion: 1. They have both been wrong, resulting in dire consequences for humanity and the environment, for the well-being of those who are more vulnerable among us, and for humanity's general understanding of the world and our place in it. 2. They have both been right too,resulting in astoundingly beau...
Read more