Pardon my French
I am beautiful, gorgeous, actually.
Well, maybe, according to the magazines in the grocerly line. If I lost fifty pounds I will be really and truly beautiful.
Maybe they're right.
So, I am beautiful if I lose fifty pounds!
And well, if only I was four or five inches taller like the models on TV.
I guess I am beautiful... if I lose fifty pounds, were four or five inches taller,
and as the ads in the salon windows say, if I was a little more tan and not so white.
I might be beautiful if I lose fifty pounds, were four or five inches taller, if I was more tan... and you know, I saw that celebrities are getting plastic sugery now!
So I guess I could be beautiful if I lose fifty pounds, were four or five inches taller, if I was more tan, and maybe if I downsized my nose, made my full lips fuller, turned my DD into EEE...
and maybe I can at least be slightly pretty if I wear contacts and have surgery to turn my big green eyes into even bigger brown or blue... and if I straighten my curly hair and grow it out longer.
You know, now that I think about it, if I could just lose fifty pounds, and if I were four or five inches taller, more tan, and if I downsized my nose, upsized my lips and chest, wore contacts to change my green eyes to brown or blue, straightened and grew out my curly hair, then and and only then would I be really and truly beautiful!
On second thought, in response to this, I will use one word I have never before used in my life:
BULLSHIT!
Well, maybe, according to the magazines in the grocerly line. If I lost fifty pounds I will be really and truly beautiful.
Maybe they're right.
So, I am beautiful if I lose fifty pounds!
And well, if only I was four or five inches taller like the models on TV.
I guess I am beautiful... if I lose fifty pounds, were four or five inches taller,
and as the ads in the salon windows say, if I was a little more tan and not so white.
I might be beautiful if I lose fifty pounds, were four or five inches taller, if I was more tan... and you know, I saw that celebrities are getting plastic sugery now!
So I guess I could be beautiful if I lose fifty pounds, were four or five inches taller, if I was more tan, and maybe if I downsized my nose, made my full lips fuller, turned my DD into EEE...
and maybe I can at least be slightly pretty if I wear contacts and have surgery to turn my big green eyes into even bigger brown or blue... and if I straighten my curly hair and grow it out longer.
You know, now that I think about it, if I could just lose fifty pounds, and if I were four or five inches taller, more tan, and if I downsized my nose, upsized my lips and chest, wore contacts to change my green eyes to brown or blue, straightened and grew out my curly hair, then and and only then would I be really and truly beautiful!
On second thought, in response to this, I will use one word I have never before used in my life:
BULLSHIT!
Comments
You rock . . .