Life is (Better Than) a Fairy Tale
I grew up reading fairy tales like a drowining person inhales air when they finally reach solid ground. The adventures, magic, good vs. evil, the emphaisis on quality of character and beauty in the stories thrilled my already overactive imagination and my naturally romantic heart. Unlike most girls though, I did not read the watered down Disney versions of fairy tales. I read the original, hard core Brothers Grimm or other old fashioned fairy tale stories. While I highly enjoy Disney stories too, there is a vast difference in style and sheer number of Borthers Grimm stories. They fill volumes and volumes of books. I remember taking out thick books from the school library. They looked older, more worn and drab than the books that my schoolmates were borrowing. Each volume was a different color-dark maroon, navy blue, emerald green- and all of the pages were yellowed and the spines of the book were slightly worn. The outside of the book may have been uninviting and the thickness of the books may have been daunting to most kids my age, but I reveled in the richness of the stories found inside.
Lately, I have noticed a trend of a cynical view of fairy tales in our culture. I hear so many people say, "Well, life is hard. It is not a fairy tale!" or I read articles that disparage the desire that little girls or little boys have to imagine themselves part of a fairy tale. (Old fashioned fairy tales also have more tales that have a male as the main character, but both old and new have the males as the rescuers and fighters for the good which young boys act out in play all the time) I once found a book by a Christian author called, "Keeping a Princess Heart in a Not-so-Fairy-Tale World." I was so excited to find a book that melded my obsession with Fairy Tales and my passion for the reality of God's love! I bought the book, brought it home and started reading it immediately, only to find the same cynical, dreary view of life! I was so disappointed! I didn't even finish reading the book as I felt it was wrong on so many levels. Someday I will write my own book so keep an eye out for it, but for now, this entry is an attempt to lay out my feelings on the subject of life and fairy tales.
The aspect of these articles, this aforemementioned book and the overall cynical attitude towards life that bothers me the most is that the premise is wrong! In the article above, the parents are bemoaning the "princess fever" because it teaches their children to have "diva" attitudes. To me, the issue is not fairy tales, but the WAY we tell the stories today. Today, we focus on the end resutlt-the priviledged Princess! In the old fashioned stories including Disney versions, most of the story focused on the journey to the point of the hero or heroine having their dreams realized. The women (and often men too) that were the main heroes of the tales had excellent character that was polished and sharpened during rough times. Only at the very end, in the books devoted to a few sentences and in the movies a minute or two, the marriage takes place or the evil wizard is bested. For some reason, our culture has decided to bypass the REASONS and JOURNEY to the stories' happy endings and only focus on the end result. Then we turn around and complain that fairy tales are unrealistic and don't teach our children anything substantial. The fault does not lie with the stories!
Take Cinderella for example. In both the Brothers Grimm and the Disney versions, Cinderella is disowned by her family and treated as a common slave in her own house! Her mother DIES, her father marries a new woman who treats her like trash and her father LETS IT HAPPEN! Cinderella spends her days scrubbing floors on her hands and knees and sleeping in the soot in the firelplace! So glamorous! In the end, the mean stepsisters cut of parts of their feet to fit into the shoe and then at Cinderella's wedding, birds peck out the step sisters' eyes as consequence of the their evil nature. No frills there! :D
Then there's Snow White. Her mother also dies and her father takes on a nasty wife (hmmm there's a moral here). The new step-mother is so jealous of Snow White's goodness and beauty that she sends her out into the woods with a hunter and instructs the hunter to murder Snow White, rip out her heart and bring it back! Thankfully, the hunter has compassion on Snow White and lets her go, but Snow White wanders around the forest alone until she finds a little house. This part cracks me up. In the book I mentioned by Nicole Johnson, she makes this story sound like it has no bearing on our modern daily life. Snow White goes to live with these small men who are so unkempt and roudy. In the Disney version they have names like, "Grumpy" and "Sneezy," "Dopey" and "Sleepy." She lives her life out amongst these kindhearted men, but I wonder at people who glorify this fairy tale heroine as having a priviledged life. Here she is stuck in the middle of the forest hiding from a wicked relative who wants to cut out her heart and she spends her days taking care of seven dirty men who are constantly in a bad mood, getting sick, are ignorant and lazy! (Mothers with children should find this scene familiar!) To top it off, the stepmother finally finds her and almost poisons her to death!
There are so many more examples, but these stories are the two most recognizable. When I write my book someday I will include many more examples and lots of stories that are not as familiar, but for now, these will do to quickly illustrate my point. The important thread in the fairy tales is the emphasis on quality of character. There is a CLEARLY defined division between good and evil. Even though evil seems to have the upper hand during most of the story, the hero/heroine maintains a passion for being kind and wise, compassionate and understanding and it pays off in the end. If anything, these stories show the value of having a good attitude despite your circumstances! Cinderella is a servant to her own family and Snow White takes care of snivelling, needy people, but they do it cheerfully and do their jobs WELL. Imagine how much more miserable they would have been if they faced each day grumbling and complaining about their lot! I love that Snow White's attitude rubs off on the Seven Dwarves in the Disney version. It is such a testament to the fact that when we do things with a cheerful attitude, even if our circumstances give us nothing to rejoice about, our attitude can rub off on other people and make everyone's life (including your own) seem so much better!
One point that I want to make before I wrap this up for now is the element of magic and mysetery in fairy tales. This is always the aspect of the stories that so many people have the most difficulty with and this is also why it is so important to me that these stories are not discredited as much as we do. It breaks my heart that we are so cynical that we have lost our sense of WONDER. Yes, life is difficult and at times so discouraging that we can't imagine there is anything wonderful about it, but how dismal would it be to believe that there is no hope beyond what we see in front of us at the moment! A sense of wonder is the reminder that life is filled with beauty and adventure and that there is some way that our circumstances are for a purpose! Best of all that there is a chance that around the next corner is a change for the better!
In many of the stories, there is a champion acting FOR the hero/heroine as well as the evil figure acting against them. In the Disney stories it is usually a fairy god-mother/fairy of some sort, but in the Brothers Grimm stories, there was more of an emphasis on God who came to the rescue through various means such as doves in Cinderella. If you are a Christian, this aspect of the stories should excite you even more! We may not have a fairy god-mother who pops up now and then to get us out of a tough spot, but we have something EVEN BETTER!!! We have an all-powerful, all-loving, always present God who is our champion against every foe, our help in times of trouble and in good times is there to be our loving Father. He is so powerful that he puts the fairy god-mothers to shame with the things he can do and provide. God is there to help us foster a cheerful attitude during those difficult times and there to comfort us during the painful times. He is the KING of fairy-tale endings! Not only does he promise that all things will work FOR THE GOOD of those who love him, but he promises us a glorious, adventurous eternal life surrounded by beauty in His loving presence!
This subject is an important one to me, not because I think fairy tales are the answer to life's problems or that we need to believe they apply exactly to our situations, but because I think the stories are an imaginitive way to foster a longing to an even greater truth. Not only that, but I think our increasing cynical attitude that "life is not a fairy tale," as in it is full of drudgery and no one ever comes to our rescue, is false and dreary. It also discredits the purpose of fairy tales as a genre. They were meant to spark imagination as well as TEACH children the importance of having quality character. No matter what life throws at us, having a strong, noble character is crucial to a more fulfilled life. Best of all, the fairy tales suggest that there are forces out there acting for and against us which displays the truth about good (God) vs. evil (Satan).
Like fairy tales, our lives are filled with mundane tasks, people who are bound to hurt us and push us down, situations that seem overwhelmingly impossible and evil around every corner. Like fairy tales, our lives also have the possiblity of growth of character, compassion from those around us, amazing adventures and "magic"! Like the characters in fairy tales we have the opportunity to choose our attitude and choose to whom we will align ourselves-to the good or to the evil. Like fairy tales we have Someone who is championing for our good, but unlike fairy tales, He is more powerful than anything we can imagine!
These stories emphasiized a hard, cruel life and the difference between having a good, wise character as opposed to an evil, coniving one. Intermixed was always a thread of love and mystery. I suggest that we embrace this attitude of love and mystery and restore our sense of WONDER about life and all that is brings us, because in reality, our lives are not only like the fairy tales we read in books or see in the movies, but they are BETTER than a fairy tale!
Lately, I have noticed a trend of a cynical view of fairy tales in our culture. I hear so many people say, "Well, life is hard. It is not a fairy tale!" or I read articles that disparage the desire that little girls or little boys have to imagine themselves part of a fairy tale. (Old fashioned fairy tales also have more tales that have a male as the main character, but both old and new have the males as the rescuers and fighters for the good which young boys act out in play all the time) I once found a book by a Christian author called, "Keeping a Princess Heart in a Not-so-Fairy-Tale World." I was so excited to find a book that melded my obsession with Fairy Tales and my passion for the reality of God's love! I bought the book, brought it home and started reading it immediately, only to find the same cynical, dreary view of life! I was so disappointed! I didn't even finish reading the book as I felt it was wrong on so many levels. Someday I will write my own book so keep an eye out for it, but for now, this entry is an attempt to lay out my feelings on the subject of life and fairy tales.
The aspect of these articles, this aforemementioned book and the overall cynical attitude towards life that bothers me the most is that the premise is wrong! In the article above, the parents are bemoaning the "princess fever" because it teaches their children to have "diva" attitudes. To me, the issue is not fairy tales, but the WAY we tell the stories today. Today, we focus on the end resutlt-the priviledged Princess! In the old fashioned stories including Disney versions, most of the story focused on the journey to the point of the hero or heroine having their dreams realized. The women (and often men too) that were the main heroes of the tales had excellent character that was polished and sharpened during rough times. Only at the very end, in the books devoted to a few sentences and in the movies a minute or two, the marriage takes place or the evil wizard is bested. For some reason, our culture has decided to bypass the REASONS and JOURNEY to the stories' happy endings and only focus on the end result. Then we turn around and complain that fairy tales are unrealistic and don't teach our children anything substantial. The fault does not lie with the stories!
Take Cinderella for example. In both the Brothers Grimm and the Disney versions, Cinderella is disowned by her family and treated as a common slave in her own house! Her mother DIES, her father marries a new woman who treats her like trash and her father LETS IT HAPPEN! Cinderella spends her days scrubbing floors on her hands and knees and sleeping in the soot in the firelplace! So glamorous! In the end, the mean stepsisters cut of parts of their feet to fit into the shoe and then at Cinderella's wedding, birds peck out the step sisters' eyes as consequence of the their evil nature. No frills there! :D
Then there's Snow White. Her mother also dies and her father takes on a nasty wife (hmmm there's a moral here). The new step-mother is so jealous of Snow White's goodness and beauty that she sends her out into the woods with a hunter and instructs the hunter to murder Snow White, rip out her heart and bring it back! Thankfully, the hunter has compassion on Snow White and lets her go, but Snow White wanders around the forest alone until she finds a little house. This part cracks me up. In the book I mentioned by Nicole Johnson, she makes this story sound like it has no bearing on our modern daily life. Snow White goes to live with these small men who are so unkempt and roudy. In the Disney version they have names like, "Grumpy" and "Sneezy," "Dopey" and "Sleepy." She lives her life out amongst these kindhearted men, but I wonder at people who glorify this fairy tale heroine as having a priviledged life. Here she is stuck in the middle of the forest hiding from a wicked relative who wants to cut out her heart and she spends her days taking care of seven dirty men who are constantly in a bad mood, getting sick, are ignorant and lazy! (Mothers with children should find this scene familiar!) To top it off, the stepmother finally finds her and almost poisons her to death!
There are so many more examples, but these stories are the two most recognizable. When I write my book someday I will include many more examples and lots of stories that are not as familiar, but for now, these will do to quickly illustrate my point. The important thread in the fairy tales is the emphasis on quality of character. There is a CLEARLY defined division between good and evil. Even though evil seems to have the upper hand during most of the story, the hero/heroine maintains a passion for being kind and wise, compassionate and understanding and it pays off in the end. If anything, these stories show the value of having a good attitude despite your circumstances! Cinderella is a servant to her own family and Snow White takes care of snivelling, needy people, but they do it cheerfully and do their jobs WELL. Imagine how much more miserable they would have been if they faced each day grumbling and complaining about their lot! I love that Snow White's attitude rubs off on the Seven Dwarves in the Disney version. It is such a testament to the fact that when we do things with a cheerful attitude, even if our circumstances give us nothing to rejoice about, our attitude can rub off on other people and make everyone's life (including your own) seem so much better!
One point that I want to make before I wrap this up for now is the element of magic and mysetery in fairy tales. This is always the aspect of the stories that so many people have the most difficulty with and this is also why it is so important to me that these stories are not discredited as much as we do. It breaks my heart that we are so cynical that we have lost our sense of WONDER. Yes, life is difficult and at times so discouraging that we can't imagine there is anything wonderful about it, but how dismal would it be to believe that there is no hope beyond what we see in front of us at the moment! A sense of wonder is the reminder that life is filled with beauty and adventure and that there is some way that our circumstances are for a purpose! Best of all that there is a chance that around the next corner is a change for the better!
In many of the stories, there is a champion acting FOR the hero/heroine as well as the evil figure acting against them. In the Disney stories it is usually a fairy god-mother/fairy of some sort, but in the Brothers Grimm stories, there was more of an emphasis on God who came to the rescue through various means such as doves in Cinderella. If you are a Christian, this aspect of the stories should excite you even more! We may not have a fairy god-mother who pops up now and then to get us out of a tough spot, but we have something EVEN BETTER!!! We have an all-powerful, all-loving, always present God who is our champion against every foe, our help in times of trouble and in good times is there to be our loving Father. He is so powerful that he puts the fairy god-mothers to shame with the things he can do and provide. God is there to help us foster a cheerful attitude during those difficult times and there to comfort us during the painful times. He is the KING of fairy-tale endings! Not only does he promise that all things will work FOR THE GOOD of those who love him, but he promises us a glorious, adventurous eternal life surrounded by beauty in His loving presence!
This subject is an important one to me, not because I think fairy tales are the answer to life's problems or that we need to believe they apply exactly to our situations, but because I think the stories are an imaginitive way to foster a longing to an even greater truth. Not only that, but I think our increasing cynical attitude that "life is not a fairy tale," as in it is full of drudgery and no one ever comes to our rescue, is false and dreary. It also discredits the purpose of fairy tales as a genre. They were meant to spark imagination as well as TEACH children the importance of having quality character. No matter what life throws at us, having a strong, noble character is crucial to a more fulfilled life. Best of all, the fairy tales suggest that there are forces out there acting for and against us which displays the truth about good (God) vs. evil (Satan).
Like fairy tales, our lives are filled with mundane tasks, people who are bound to hurt us and push us down, situations that seem overwhelmingly impossible and evil around every corner. Like fairy tales, our lives also have the possiblity of growth of character, compassion from those around us, amazing adventures and "magic"! Like the characters in fairy tales we have the opportunity to choose our attitude and choose to whom we will align ourselves-to the good or to the evil. Like fairy tales we have Someone who is championing for our good, but unlike fairy tales, He is more powerful than anything we can imagine!
These stories emphasiized a hard, cruel life and the difference between having a good, wise character as opposed to an evil, coniving one. Intermixed was always a thread of love and mystery. I suggest that we embrace this attitude of love and mystery and restore our sense of WONDER about life and all that is brings us, because in reality, our lives are not only like the fairy tales we read in books or see in the movies, but they are BETTER than a fairy tale!
Comments
I've also wondered about the coming of age elements in fairy tales. It seems like several of them have to do with the (often accidental) protection of a girl while she is blossoming into womanhood, and then suddenly she is swept off into marriage, all wide-eyed and innocent. What are your thoughts on that element?
More on topic, probably we are MOST vulnerable when growing up...we are affected emotionally, spiritually, physically... In the stories, there is always someone or some people who are guardians of the women...a fairy god-mother, the seven dwarves, animals etc until they are in the care of the "ultimate protector" Again, it works both ways-spiritually speaking God sends his angels and works in our lives to protect us even before we are saved. If the before married = here on earth and after married = in heaven, then it is the same, there are evil beings in the world that try to harm us, but God protects us and when we get to heaven to be united with the Lord, nothing can hurt us. Then on a shearly human level, when we are growing up, hopefully there are people who fight on our behalf-relatives, friends, laws, God to protect us from the influence of evil while we are "blossoming". I think in marriage, all aspects of our womanhood, sexuality, mothering, help-mate role are realized and hopefully protected and nurtured. That is the way God designed it at least. Obviously sin still gets in the way, but doing things God's way is kind of like living a fairy tale. It is other wordly, beautiful, mysterious and magical.